Gavin Scott |
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14 Apr

Absolute Mayhem

Here is a picture to gladden any teacher’s heart: a class guided by Terry Jones to such good behaviour  so that the only sound is an overheard whisper: “Oh, good, we get to read a whole chapter this lesson”  But this is after our hero Neil has worked his magic – so Terry’s next task was to create the scene BEFORE Simon Pegg waved his hand, urging them to be gamblers, dancers on tables and wild throwers of paper darts.  And strangely enough, with very little encouragement, mayhem ensued.  Satisfying, I think the...

14 Apr

Making Up The News

Before I became a screenwriter I was a journalist, and sometimes I read the news for ITN.  Today I got the chance to combine my old profession with my new one by playing the part of a newsreader in our movie, which gave me the chance not only to put on my old dark blazer and red tie, (while still wearing my jeans and sneakers under the desk) but also to look very serious while reading out news stories that were entirely made up. This was not something they generally allowed...

10 Apr

On the Buses

   Kare Sivertsen, our Producer Assistant, climbed into the engine of a Routemaster bus today, doubling for Simon Pegg, who has made yet another of his badly thought out wishes about being in a bus. What he hasn’t realised yet is that his powers take his commands VERY literally, and he ends up jammed inside the engine compartment with only his arm sticking out. But when you open the bonnet of a Routemaster to the untrained there seems to be no room whatsoever for us to perform this gag. Enter Kare,...

10 Apr

Enter – Brian Cox

 Britain’s liveliest scientist, Brian Cox, came to record a scene today in which he explains how the earth had come to turn into a giant snowball, not knowing, of course, that it was all Simon Pegg’s fault. As the hair and makeup artists got him ready, we started talking about global warming and ice ages, beginning the most information rich and delightful conversation I have had for a long time. Among our topics: how ice ages have helped make the human brain bigger, how the resonance of Jupiter affects life on...

10 Apr

Absolutely Anything Author Demolition

A busy morning today as we prepare to film a scene in a TV studio in which Joanna Lumley, as a ruthless book programme presenter, eviscerates a hapless author while our heroine Catherine looks on, appalled. We’d written Joanna’s introductory remarks but stopped there, because we’ll then cut to the control room next door in which Catherine is harassed by her oily boss, played by Robert Bathurst of Downton Abbey fame. But what Terry realised in the early hours of the morning was that Joanna’s interview with the author will have...

08 Apr

Absolutely Anything Day 13

Today we got our own bus to play with. Well, the loan of a bus, which we fill with extras who gaze in astonishment at a very disheveled Simon (explanations later) as he magically appears, jumps off and runs down the road past the bus stop. But there’s a problem: we’ve been provided with the wrong sort of bus stop. And though another sort of bus stop can be provided, it won’t be here for forty five minutes. I’m afraid I must own up to consoling Terry by pointing out that...

08 Apr

Absolutely Anything Day 12 Part Two

One of the delights of filming is when everybody jumps in a van and roars off somewhere to check something, as we did this morning. It was the bridge over archway where something VERY IMPORTANT will happen towards the end of the movie. And the view was terrific. After which Terry found another cool place to shoot.  Then we jumped in the van again and went down to Archway to plan a scene in which … well, it involves irrational admirers of one of our characters. And Terry demonstrated very vividly just...

08 Apr

Absolutely Anything Day 12

Coming back from our location day in Woolwich, this slightly run-down old ex-school is beginning to be like home – a home with a very large family in it, with people saying greeting each other from the Camera Department, the Art Department, Production, Hair and Make Up and Sound, jokes doing the rounds, stories being exchanged, and the benign figure of Terry, holding tight to his storyboards, moving with a kind of (generally) serene determination through it all. Today he and I go up to the room where the editing...

07 Apr

The Adventures of Toby Wey

I wrote "Toby Wey" to be the sort of novel I myself like to read. That is, one which takes me to another world (in this case pre-Victorian England), has a hero who's trying to achieve something against the odds, is full of action, and tells me something about our world I didn't know before. Whether I've achieved that with "Toby Wey" you'll have to be the judge, but that's my goal. Click play below to watch a video which will give you an idea what "Toby Wey" is about. I do hope...

07 Apr

Famous Extras

This is the scene in which Catherine presents Neil with an award for the brilliant book he hasn’t written yet, and he accepts modestly in front of a crowd of extras. But this being a Terry Jones movie, our extras include people like BBC Arts Supremo Alan Yentob, last seen on W1A arm wrestling with Salman Rushdie, who declines to arm wrestle with me, but does offer to do a selfie. Perhaps I will include him in my next novel. ...